It has been a rough seven + weeks and am sorry for not updating or writing for a while. I have had a hiatus from chemo for seven weeks with this past Tuesday being the first time (Round 8 of chemo) I have had a chemical bombing since January. I talked to Lloyd Carr, Click to read full story…
“Happy are they that stay firm when trials come. They have proven themselves and will win the prize of life, the crown that the Lord has promised to those who love Him.” ~ James 1:12
Well, it has been a whirlwind of life events; ER visits;, three hospital stays; coming down with Bronchial Pneumonia and sinus infection in the springtime; several unexpected deaths; hot water and power going out a few times; computer/tech problems; breathing problems – have had to get acclimated to oxygen machines/tanks and a CPAP, Continuous Positive Airway Pressure nighttime breathing apparatus; major organ damage that has caused much pain and discomfort; medical, insurance and other bureaucratic battles; and so much more that friends have had to occasionally remind me of things that have happened to me the past two months…
As I am writing this, I ponder all the decisions, extra doc appointments, lab work, invasive radiology tests, and other exams that I have had to endure while preparing for the necessary Stem Cell Transplant that I agreed to undergo starting on this day and being admitted into the hospital for at least a month plus a few more months of incubation in the summer which was very hard for me, but, needed to be done in order to save my life. My body has been declining rapidly and it has been a very torturous, scary and exhausting experience that has taken its toll.
Today marks the day that I should have started the transplant journey that I have been physically, emotionally, mentally, and financially preparing to accept and bear. Unfortunately, I received bad news last week informing me that the stem cell transplant that is the only treatment process for me to survive this dreadful Amyloidosis and Multiple Myeloma was denied. For all of the naysayers out there – the proverbial “death panels” do, indeed, exist and I have been deemed unworthy to receive the medical care (by unqualified, administrative bureaucrats who are not doctors!) that is crucial for surviving the blood disease and cancer that has plagued me which I did not contrive by unhealthy lifestyle choices like so many who are deemed worthy to live and are treated. I am devastated and now have to go through a tedious/costly appeals process (in addition to many others) that may take weeks, months or years – time that I do not have. L
After all the chemo (9 rounds – received my last treatment three weeks ago), harsh meds, steroids, and traveling over 11,000 miles driven in 7 1/2 months, and much stress, suffering and prep – now, it all has been a waste as all these invasive procedures were merely preps for the ultimate transplant. I am beyond bummed and now, really have no choice but to just continue to try to minimize the misery, take care of myself the best that I can, try to enjoy life under the circumstances and hope that my natural remedies and/or a miracle takes place to keep me alive. I have given everything to God and hope that He has mercy on me as there is nothing much I can do this point and do not have the resources, time, energy and strength to fight this battle as I would if I were even back to my “old unhealthy” self.
I have only shared the “Cliff’s Notes” version of this saga as it is so gory and filled with sorrow and pain that I do not enjoy re-hashing it or bringing anyone down due to my plights. I apologize for not updating everyone on a consistent basis, however, it has not only been difficult to write with massive headaches, crippled fingers and one blurry eye, but also has been arduous on an emotional level. Most know me as the quintessential “Ms. Pollyanna” with a sometimes annoying positive attitude, profuse independence, fervor, strength and determination who always moves forward and rarely looks back under the worst of situations affecting her personal life and the trials of others. Having been a perpetual “Giver” since childhood (paying the price most of the time) and now having to be a “Receiver” at the mercy of others has been extremely difficult through this ordeal. My attitude has wavered a bit, but, I am still keeping my faith and trusting that God, indeed, has a purpose and plan for me despite the all-encompassing wrath.
Sidebar: I want to briefly explain this blog post cover photo. This photo was taken about three weeks ago. While I was talking to a good friend of mine, after hearing some bad news, I looked at my arm and could see a heart shape forming. I believe this was a sign from the Lord to warm my heart, experience some peace, and keep up my faith. I had a scar and bruise that covered about half of my left inside forearm from an IV pic line from a hospital stay in early April that converted to this interesting bruise turned tattoo that has now healed and has vanished for good…. J
God Bless all who care and are praying for/with me, inspiring me, supporting me, challenging me, motivating me, humoring me, laughing with me; crying with me and cheering me on to victory on this long, grueling and demanding episode of the “real” Survivor. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart and soul. (Bittersweet tears)
 Round 7 of Chemo and coming out of the rain and fog…This journey has really been a whirlwind for me and I am having more and more difficulties doing simple daily tasks and things I enjoy like just reading and writing anymore. My chemo Tuesday started off ok, however, as the day progressed and all the rain and fog that made driving a nightmare to my Click to read full story… |
 Round 6 of Chemo after a brutal hiatus…Well, it has been a tumultuous three weeks, unfortunately. :( Initially, my tongue swelled-up to enormous proportions and landed me in the ER with a torn lip and much trauma. Then, I was admitted to the hospital and two days later contracted the flu having no symptoms except a 7 hour fever due to the Click to read full story… |
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 Round 5 of Chemo & Some MSU Victory Fun in U of M Territory…I am happy to report that my New Years Eve and Day were good days on a physical level for me and I felt better than I have in months – which was a minor miracle for me! This relief came after experiencing extreme pain, discomfort, swelling and exasperated Amyloidosis symptoms that were, at times, Click to read full story… |
 Have an Enjoyable Kick-start to 2013!Out with the old And in with the new A brand new year For me and you A brand new year A brand new start To follow your dreams To follow your heart To dwell on the good Not on the bad To dwell on the happy And not on the sad Give thanks to Click to read full story… |
 Round 4 of Chemo – resuming one more cycle for now…Not really the Merry Christmas scenario that I looked forward to, however, I did have a nice, somber Christmas despite the plight that I am going through. Had some time to reflect and really am at odds putting all the harsh chemo drugs and multitude of other drugs in my body to curb the side Click to read full story… |
 Two Inspirational Poems to Warm your Hearts for Christmas 2012…Holy Father May the presence of your Son among us always make it possible for me to give and share the greatest gift, communion with you through Him by the power of the Holy Spirit. Thank you. As, I celebrate this Christmas I, no doubt, have more reflection than I ever have had before and would Click to read full story… |
 Recipes: Bone & Blood-Building Marrow Soup and a Rum Runner Balls Treat…I have been experimenting with the Organic Bone Marrow Soup Recipe and feel that the best taste is derived from using half bones with marrow and half bones with meat. I am indulging in two cups of this soup daily to nourish my blood and bones from the Amyloid proteins that are building and attacking Click to read full story… |
 Last chemo treatment until after Christmas!“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.” ~ Romans 12:12 How can we keep our circumstances from determining our mood? How can we emancipate ourselves from the limitations that life deals us? The last in the trio of commandments opens the door for the other two to be true — we Click to read full story… |
 Two of my favorite Italian Comfort Food Recipes…Through this Cancer journey, there are times that I cannot eat at all and have to resort to only soft foods which is so difficult for me as a confessed “Foodie” – lover of gourmet cuisine, and, as a Juvenile Diabetic who has to eat and take care of herself 24-7 balancing food, nutrition and Click to read full story… |
 Round Two on the chemo road to healing…Yesterday, I reluctantly made my trek to the U of M Cancer Center in Ann Arbor to receive my second round of chemo. The morning and overall day were an unusual 60 degree balmy December day, but, very dismal, dark, gray and wet which did not help the mood much. On the drive there were Click to read full story… |
 A day in the Life – Juggling food, nutrition and chemo…Well, most know me as being the quintessential “health nut” for most of my life. Stemming from a surgery that went terribly wrong when I was eight years old to then being diagnosed with Juvenile Diabetes that was like a death sentence and a 24 hour illness like no other that is a never-ending roller Click to read full story… |
 My Journey – The Allopathic way +…“We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. Therefore, we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an Click to read full story… |
 Founding Fathers created 1st healthcare battle – now, to initiate state “exchanges” or not?“The current national debate on health care is nothing new. The founding fathers debated their own health care regulations — and faced a revolt — some 200 years ago.” ~ Andrew Wehrman, an article for the Boston Globe, ”A Pox on You” The modern-day healthcare revolt is upon us whether we like it or not. When a Click to read full story… |
 Stay away from these political protozoan personality types in future elections…“I have no qualifications to do anything else and there weren’t any formal application forms you had to fill in for stand-up, so I thought I’d give that a twist.” ~ Dylan Moran, Comedian This philosophy is appropriate for Comedians and, perhaps, some in the entertainment business, however, should NOT be the motivation for a Click to read full story… |
 Blessings of Thanksgiving – Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow….For beauty in nature, Your glory we see For joy and health, friends and family, For daily provision, Your mercy and care These are the blessings You graciously share. So today we offer this response of praise With a promise to follow You all of our days… The Pilgrims Came The Pilgrims came Click to read full story… |
 The Motown kid introduced the new kid, Paul Ryan, at OU rally“If it looks good, you’ll see it. If it sounds good, you’ll hear it. If it’s marketed right, you’ll buy it. But… if it’s real, you’ll feel it. “ ~ Kid Rock Paul Ryan’s visit to Oakland University in Rochester Hills, MI on October 8th proved the words from homegrown rocker, Kid Rock, correct. The Athletic Click to read full story… |
 Where is the word of God in OUR Society????Recently, I was diagnosed with a very rare form of blood cancer and my head and heart have literally been spinning as I reflect on my own life, all the deceitful and angry words/tactics being flung on social media platforms blatantly and behind the profile, the “why me” syndrome, the sad state of affairs of Click to read full story… |
 Save LAURETA SOKOLI NIEAJ from deportation!*** I am happy to report that there has been a temporary stay issued for Laureta, although, the fight is far from over. Please continue to pray, write, contact and spread the word in order for complete justice to be done!***When I first heard about this story, I was heartbroken. An Albanian mother of an Click to read full story… |
 Slick Olive Oil Scandal – Buyer beware…Well, here we go, another scandal involving a good quality, healthy and expensive food product that is consumed worldwide. This news is scary and really makes you wonder how many other food product and/or supplement companies are doing the old “bait and switch” routine of conning and cheating customers??? Please read the full article below Click to read full story… |
 Herman Cain delivers a special $9.99 endorsement to candidate Brad Hantler (MI-39)“Rather than joining the exodus of college graduates leaving the State of Michigan for jobs in other states, I am staying here, to be part of the solution. We need to get Michigan back to work by reducing the cost of government, making Michigan more competitive in attracting jobs and modernizing education for the 21st Click to read full story… |
 Gov. Snyder stopped in Port Huron to tour and answer questions re: Reinventing Michigan“Reinvesting in Michigan’s infrastructure is essential to growing Michigan’s economy and enhancing its quality of life. We’ve been beaten up for too many years. … We’ve become too negative … we’ve gotten caught up too much in a win-lose attitude. It is time for us to stand up as Michiganders and say here is Click to read full story… |
 Apology and Integrity in the Political realm – Is it a sign of true Leadership?As the Primary and General Elections are drawing near, I see so many mistakes being made by both seasoned politicians and neophytes. This is part of my job as a Publicist and Political/Media consultant. There seems to be an epic wave of candidates lacking basic accountability and responsibility for their actions of late and it Click to read full story… |
 Remembering our troops, past and present, on this Memorial Day Weekend!Wishing everyone a safe, fun and peaceful Memorial Day Weekend! Please take a moment to view the “heartwarming” pdf above (click on heart) as well as ponder the reflection from a soldier, below. Demonstrate gratitude for OUR Troops on this Holiday and every day for the bravery and sacrifices these men and women Click to read full story… |
 Day of Glory – Prayer and Paul Revere“You know the rest. In the books you have read the British Regulars fired and fled,— How the farmers gave them ball for ball, From behind each fence and farmyard wall, Chasing the redcoats down the lane, Then crossing the fields to emerge again Under the trees at the turn of the road, And only Click to read full story… |
 Will Hundreds of thousands lose Internet access in July? Check your computer for Malware….This disturbing report/warning just came out 14 hours ago from the Associated Press and then Google has disseminated the information… WASHINGTON (AP) — For computer users, a few mouse clicks could mean the difference between staying online and losing Internet connections this summer. Unknown to most of them, their problem began when international hackers ran Click to read full story… |
 Should more dice keep rolling in Michigan or will the jackpot stay at lucky number 25?“There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one.” ~ Jack Yelton As the old adage goes, and most would agree – the House always wins. So why are casinos so popular despite the very high risk that is at stake? Does it Click to read full story… |
 New Scented Candle from, Interior Designer, Sandra Espinet…Sandy and I have been friends since college and I am proud to announce another great product from her “Se” line. She has traveled the world and gains her inspiration from a vast range of countries, ethnicities and cultures. Sandy has been featured as a Design Pro on HGTV and other related Home & Click to read full story… |
 Easter Reflection…At the age of 33, Jesus was condemned to the death penalty. At the time, crucifixion was the “worst” death. Only the worst criminals condemned to be crucified. Yet, it was even more dreadful for Jesus, for unlike other criminals condemned to death by crucifixion, Jesus was nailed to the cross by His hands and feet, Click to read full story… |
 Reality “check” – time to cut the pay of our elected officials on Capitol Hill…With the partial exceptions of health insurance and retirement benefits, We the People pay for the compensation of our elected representatives. We are literally their employers. Here is some info and stats to shed some light on this highly controversial topic in America. Bottom line, it seems like our elected officials get exponentially wealthy after Click to read full story… |
 Happy St. Patrick’s Day!“May your pockets be heavy and your heart be light, May good luck pursue you each morning and night.” ~ Irish Blessing This is what true “green” is all about – Happy St. Patrick’s Day, everyone! |
